It's a oh-so-called-life of Joker and Harley
by Bi-JokerHarley
Summary: This story about Harley and Joker's life, obviously. Before/after Suicide Squad, short stories based on one main story line. What were in their past? What will be in their future? And what's about the present? And this is all my imagination, what I think they are, hope you enjoy it.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello and greeting, this is my first, first ever fanfic write about the Joker and Harley, all come with an idea that if I want a story of them in my liking way then I should write it on my own of liking way, and also being inspired by all the wonderfull writers out there, so here I am, writing my first ever fanfic about JARLEY~~ Also I apoloziged for my stupid grammar, English is not my mother tounge (obviously!) :p And about the M rated thing, I'm not really good at it but will try my best hehehehe...**

 **And liked I said in the summary, yeah this story taken place after the Suicide Squad, and it was about the Joker's and Harley's normal-not-so-normal life, was it diffrence from us!? If yes, then how much diffs were there? And how about their future? What will bring them in the future? Read to find out~**

 **Oh and another thing, if my idea doesn't go well with any's idea out there then leave me, don't use bad words or anything to harash me please! AND ONE MORE THING... COMMENT! Tell me everything you want to tell, ideas, opinions or should I need to fix anything, or the story is good or not, does it need to improve anything, feel free to tell me, just don't use bad words (even thought I might use them in the story but yeah...)**

 **I don't own any characters in here beside some that might come in the future~**

 **Enjoy~~**

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Chapter 1: Pilot _(with a hoping my story will be not so bad)_

It was a usual day in the Gotham city, cooling air were blowing through every corners of it, the streets were crowded and there were just those normal urban's noises, everything were just so peaceful and all… Just until… Just until the loudest also the scariest noises were drifting from somewhere down the street to the biggest bank of Gotham, the sounds of police cars can be heard from everywhere, seemed liked Gotham has all of it's polices out there, all just for chasing ONE, only ONE car, the infamous purple lamborghini which owned by the most scariest criminal, ah no, we have to call him the most scariest VILLIAN, because he was no ciminal, he was the most kick-ass villian that this universe has ever had, the one and only, the king of crime, the king of all Gotham's nightmares, THE JOKER! Along side with him, as always was his gorgeous and infamous queen, the HARLEY fucking QUINN. Both of them were laughing while being chased by the torn of police cars, drifting through every streets, dared to crash everything that came on their way.

"COME ON PUDDIN'! SHOW THEM WHO IS BOSS!" Harley yelled as she straightened herself on her seat, got ready for the thing that'd come.

"Ohhh shall we?" Joker replied to her with a wide grin on his face, and he pushed the button, acting up the power, the car roared louder and in no time it sped up to the max of speed. Joker and Harley laughed harder while their car was crashed all other cars were on their way.

Just when they were about to run away from those polices, a black mobile appeared, the famous batmobile came chasing after them.

"Ohhh Puddin' looks! Who's here to play with us!?" Harley's grin got wider when she saw the batmobile came after them.

"The good… gooooood old friend of us, the one who has thrown you into that hole, hasn't he!? How about we thank him for that baby? What'cha thinks?" Joker grinned again and turned to look at Harley, yes how can he forgot that night, the night when his lovely queen has been taken away by that stupid bat and then be throwing out to that stupid war, which almost caught both of them their lives.

"Oh my Puddin' are so generous, isn't he!? And I love you for that~~" Harley barked at her Puddin' in a naughty-sexy way and grinned. Just that, she looked out of her window, pull a golden gun toward the batmobile, then started to shoot like there were no tomorrow, Batman was about to get out and jump on their car (like he always did) but with Harley kept shooting like this, it was just so hard, he knew that they gonna played hard this time, he tried his best to avoided the shooting, but to his bad luck, a bullet hit his car's tire and it made him lose his steering, the batmobile lose track and flied through the safety fence then into the cold water of the river. Luckily enough for him that he jumped out right on time but that little of distracted was enough for Joker and Harley to get away from him. So Batman just stood there and dumbly watched as the clow couple drove away from his sight.

"IT'S A PAYBACK BATSY!" Harley yelled out from far away and laughed along with her own joke, Joker also joined her with the maniac laugh of him. Add in to their happiness, Harley pulled out her designed pistol, pointed it out of the windown and shooting crazily, randomly to any unlucky victims to get it.

"THIS IS THE BEST DATE EVER!" Harley shouted and looked at her Puddin', he looked back at her, then they got into a passionated kiss.

"So so so happy, aren't you my honey bunny?" Joker asked when they pulled out from the kiss, which caused a lot of terrors because Joker were driving and he didn't even look at the street but just like he would care!?

"Uh huh~~ It's been soooo long since I have this much of fun Puddin', and you're the only one can make me this happy you know!?" Harley smiled a flirty smile to the Joker, he laughed more at her and took it as her compliment.

"My pleasure lady!" Just that he pulled the handle again, and the car rised it's speed once again, drifting faster through the street.

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After a few rounds of strolling around town, they arrived at their house (which is a high rise building full of apartments, penhouses and offices for rent, and WHICH is Joker's property), he parked his car in his private parking garage in the basement of the building, and headed up to their penhouse which was at the top floor. Their penhouse is the most luxury also efficient in the whole building, three stories; has it's own garage; own elevator; own pool; 3 bedrooms; 5 bathrooms and a private gym (even thought the Joker and Harley prefered to do their "exercise" in their bedroom more but they couldn't help the thought of having one in the house), of course a toy room with a lot, a lot of "toys"; oh yes a jazzcuzi near the pool also, which is at the rooftop of the building, where you can watch the whole city while dipping in the warm water blowing with bubbles after a tiring day of killing or robbing other people. And the house were decorated with white and gold colors, and when I said gold it's mean REAL GOLD, and furnitures also were all expensived, highly fucking expensive furnitures. Joker maybe a villian, but hell he knows how to enjoy his life more than anyone else in this city, and you can see it through his house(s) and cars, as Harley called him "real classy"... Oh did I tell you that they also have TWO fucking walking closets!? If not then yes, they have! One for Joker, one for Harley, all stuffed with designed-expensived clothes, shoes, and accessories...

"Awww home sweet home~~" Harley grinned widely as she entered their penhouse, Joker was just right behind her, curved his lips for a little smile, while watching Harley dancing around the livingroom.

"It's been days since I broked you out of that hell hole but seem like you still get excited everytimes we get back here huh doll-face?" Joker said as he came closed to her, pulled her into his arms, kissed her a soft and sweet kiss on the lips.

"That hell of a hole was really terribled, you know it, so no matter how long since the last time I got out of there, I still can't help myself but feeling lucky, and happy, to be here… and… to be with you." She said it in a seductived way, biting her lips as her hand run through his showed bare chest, looked at him deeply in the eyes.

"Sweet sweet talk again huh pumpkin? You know how much I love it when you say those things huh?" Joker said smiling as his lips run down to her neck, made a tickled feeling to Harley's neck, which she giggled.

"I know and I also know what comes after that too..." She bit her lips again. "Ohh~ you know!? What is it then?" Joker rised his eyebrown, made a pretending confused face.

"Naughty, naughty... How can you ask such a question like that when you will be the one who start?" She pinched his cheeks playfully.

"Oh if you said so..." With that he pulled her upstair and straight to their room, carefully closed the door, all sounds could be heard after that were a bunch of sounds which 18+ allowed.

The King and Queen of Gotham were together again, and this time no shit gonna teared them apart! Gotham, get ready for more!

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 **And... Here's my first chapter, please tell me what you think, and is it too short? And anyone interested in some M rated things!? hehehe Please let me know, because it's really important to me!**

 **Thank you again~~~**


	2. Chapter 2

**Here the new chapter, I write this because I love this, and hoping you guys might love it. Please let me know your feed back!**

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 **Chap 2** : **_A jealousy Harley._**

Loud music that cause your ears damaged, colorful lights dancing around above the sky, cars after cars passing through the gate of a big mansion, and in the back yard of that mansion there were full of people. People of every social class, from celebrities, the mega riches, the mafias, mobsters, government officials, dirty cops to those little henchmen who probably be there just to protect their boss or some undefined people who sneaked in the mansion in order to try their luck, to find a job or fame maybe… But whose party was this? What' cha think? Not the Bruce Wayne, because it'd be boring, so yesss this party was belonged to our infamous Joker.

Joker has this habit to throw party every month, not only because he wanted to have fun but also liked he always said "good for business" that's why you can see the mega riches were there, too. Joker was a gangster, yes, but nobody known he was actually also a business man, he has a big comapy, no a huge incoporation, which contains many brands include industry, petroleum industry, entertainment, tourism, hotels and restaurants around the world, and even fashion… But why? Doesn't crime bring him enough money? Joker was a smart person, he knew so well if he only stuck to the dark side of crime, one day he would be destroyed, this one help the other one, simple rule, that was why he started his business righ away when he has a little bit of money and power, then made it bigger and bigger till this day. And thanks to the growing in both of his illegal and legal business, Joker's empire has become unbreakabled.

Back to the party, he threw these parties to entertain his business partners and some of his contracts have been signed in these parties liked this, too. But another important reason was his Queen loved parties, and showing off his beautiful and talented Queen also his favorite. Righ at the moment, Harley was dancing off on the dance floor, swinging around and entertained every single person she bumped into, showing off her sexy dance moves and flirting with some guys then kick their asses out was her little game every single party. After awhile, Harley felt tired and kinda bored with her game, so she came up to the bar and prepared herself a drink, she sat there and sipping her drink, even though she didn't make any efforts at all, guys still came up to her, trying to impress her, flirting, showing off their muscles, or being funny, all the usual things… For Harley those guys were nothing but dump, she felt both sorry but humored for them, because we all known her one and only love was The Joker, who got everything that those guys had or even more. Speaking of the devil, there he was, slowly walking through the crowd and got closer to her, his lips curved into a smile.

"Hey Puddin' what'cha doing here? Wanna join the club?" Harley asked him and caused some guys that were surrounding her, they all turned around to see who was their competitor, and all gasped when they saw Joker stood behind them, his smile was there but his eyes were darkened, showing his anger.

"Oh fuck… Joker… You like her? Then she's your!" One of the stupid guy spoke up, held his arms high.

"Wow how kind, I'm so appriciated. It's just one tiny bitty itty problem…" Joker spoke as he stood nearby Harley, wrapped his arm around her waist, pull her closed. All the guys were freezing as they watching every movement of him, for Harley she just smirked.

"She's mine since the first place, how can you guys abdicate her to me then? Or should I be the one who give her to you then?" Joker raised his eyesbrown, and all those guys squealed as their skin got pale, paler than his own skin.

"OMG! She's HARLEY? So so sorry Joke! We didn't know it was her. We know it was our bad in the first place, please forgive us!" All of them begged for their lives, Joker looked at Harley, who just shrugged liked it was none of her business, and started playing with her hair instead.

"Tsk I'm just kidding! Look at you guys, sooo fightening. It's my party after all and I have a rule of no killing, even though sometimes I always be the one who broke it first, so you might feel lucky, now go and have fun." All the guys were so happy they kept thanking Joker. "But one more thing, remember her face clearly, because next time is not gonna be 'lucky you' anymore!" He warned as all of them shook their up and down real hard and fast, with a waye from the Joker they all gone.

"Hmmmm so rare, so rare." Harley mocked as she still playing with her block of hair.

"What's rare?" Joker looked at her questioned; she smiled and run her hand toward his jawline.

"You! Forgaved them so easily like that, so unliked you." Still looking at him, her hand was now traveled to his green hair, smoothing them as she said.

"You're not happy about that honey? Wanna daddy to kill them for you?" Joker asked as he rested his forehead to her, breathing deeply, taking all the smell of her perfume, her signatured smell. Seeing Harley didn't say anything, he spoke again- "You know… It's bad for business… Besided… I have my rule, Harls." She just pouted with his answer; clearly she didn't happy about it.

"Business, business, business… It's always about business, you never care about me!" She huffed, as Joker just chuckled with her childish, he shook his head and leaned closer to her.

"Oh my Harls, tell me how can I feed you without those itsy bitsy businesses!? How can I surround you with those shinny, spakling diamonds and golds? And how can I pay for all those fancy clothes, shoes and that owned signature perfume of your? The perfume which I really don't know how on earth you can run two to three bottles within a month?" He growled at her, making her laughed softly with a little bit of shame, her face flushed.

"But I know you love it too, don't you?" Harley pouted again at Joker, "Smelling good for daddy, eased daddy's mind." Closely she changed her voice into a seductive one, looking up at her lover, one of her hand running all over his tattoed chest.

"Leave it for tonight doll-face, daddy still have some work to do." He patted her head and turned to leave without saying anything else, leaving Harley frowned… again. She turned back to her drink, slowly sipping it and watched other people enjoying the party, for her there'd be no fun without her Puddin'.

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 **~~About 30 minutes passed~~**

Harley has waited enough and she though this time would be ok to go to check on her lover, usually it took not too long for a contract, because it all depended on Joker, wether he liked it or not he'd be the one who made the decision, more words spoken then there'd be a hole between the eyes righ away, but that what when he worked with those gangsters about drugs, weapons,… if it were those real business men then he'd be more patience and actually talked with them about conditions and stuffs. But then again, Harley knew today he only had weapons deal, an impot one, there were this new "toy" which the government has invented and has not yet to be announced anywhere but thanks to Joker's "friend" from the White House, he knew and he immadately wanted to have it, played with it, and of course treated the Batsy some funs.

As Harley reached closer to where Joker was dealing his business, she spotted something… no someone actually… A woman, a beautiful woman indeed, well cannot compare to her but she's pretty anyway, Harley though to herself as she walked closer. The more she walked closer the more unsual it seemed to her, that woman… that bitch ARE CLINGING TO HER PUDDIN'! That bitch held her Puddin' tight, arms clinging to his, one hand she played with his hair and the other wanderred around his chest, but the most important thing was… JOKER DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER! "The fuck he's laughing with that bitch! Was I death yet? NOOO I'm still here you're idiot, I'm watching you, you piece of cheating shit and your whore!" She groaned out loud as her head became red with anger. Harley stormed to the laughing pair, when she reached them they both stopped and looked up at her, and the whore was still holding closed on Joker, the said clown stood still as he saw Harley.

"Oh hi there~~ we have had enough drinks, thank you! We're busy at the moment." The bitch waved her hand toward Harley her hands and eyes still on The King of Crime, which just cause Harley angrier. "Oh you bitch called me a waitress?" She though to herself as her rage kept going up.

"Opps… Really? Are you sure you have enough? Because I think you need something to cool down… cool down that lustful thing which was growing in your eyes, maybe!?" Harley said mockingly, the girl stood up in rage.

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY? DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?" The whore yelled out at Harley, while she just stood there calmly looked at Joker, who just shrugged.

"Well I don't know, might this handsomeman introduce **his new girlfriend** to me, can he?" She said slightly as her eyes landed at Joker, he wrinkled his eyebrown, even though he doesn't have any, and he let out a low growled at her tease, but he spoke up anyway.

"Hmmm… This is Victoria, she agrees to help me to import the new toy which you know what…" He said slowly and lazily pointed at the girl then he pointed back to Harley; "And Vic… this one, she's the one and only, the infamous Harley Quinn as I've told you to be careful with… She's my queen." He said the last part as he looked up at Harley and grinned wided, some prides were showing in his eyes. With that a beautiful designed gun pointed straight into Victoria's face, caused it turned pale.

"You heard him, right Vic Vic? I'm his queen, his love and his one and only… But then a few moments ago I saw someone has touched… my man in a way… I don't think… approriated much… don't you think?" Harley said with a wided grin on her face, still pointing her gun at the bitch who were trying to seductived her boyfriend.

"Harley I really don't know about this… Honestly, yes it's true that I've heard that he has a girlfriend but I just thought might just some random girls… He never made anyone offcial before you know right? So I thought it just some rumors… I don't really… Please please forgive me!" Victori begged for her life, and in her eyes there were tears.

"Ouch you don't think he would ever have a real girlfriend? But then weren't you trying to be his? Or it just a mistake?" – "Yes yes it just a mistake, we were just talking about the weapon." Victoria smiled weakly as she pulled the worst lie ever.

"LIAR! And you know why I can be his girlfriend, because oh my Lord, we have sooooo much in common you know? We're psychopaths, we're crazy and love to kill, we hate LIARS as much as we hate to… share." With the last word, Harley pulled the trigger, the gun blown up also Victoria's head.

"Well well Harls jelly much isn't she? But Harls… You killed her then HOW THE HELL CAN I HAVE MY TOY NOW?" Joker stood up and shouted angrily at her, while Harley in the other hand just stood calmly looked at him, a pout appeared in her face.

"Hmm then I think you should figure it out then, and next time if you want your business goes smoothly, try to stays away from those chicks can you? Like I said, I hate sharing, just as much as you do." She looked deep in his eyes, said in her calmest tone; Joker let out a low sighed.

"Whatever! Next time you stay far far far away from here, aren't you clear?" He ordered her. "Ok then, all you have to do tonight is staying away from me can you? You… mister… tonight… will sleep on wherever your heart desired but our bedroom and next to me." And she walked away fast, left an angry clown behind, shouted her to come back then kicked everything that got in his sight.

 _Man… sometimes he has to learn, too…_


	3. Chapter 3

**Here is my new chapter, and I tried to write it a bit darker, hope you enjoy~ A little journey back to the past.**

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 **Chap 3: The day when she was born**

 _What's really wrong with this woman? No one can be crazier than me, isn't it? -_ Joker thougt to himself as he driving fast through the street of Gotham, chasing by Harleen. They just got into a little surprised "meeting" right on the… street, she was trying to shoot him there but he has snatched that gun out of her hand soon enough and slapped her so hard that she fell down on the ground, she stood up right after and they gave in a kiss, in the moment when she was lost in the kiss he's quickly got into his car and drove away. Just thought it was enough to escaped from her, but dear Lord he was sooo wrong, when he looked at his side mirror and saw her again, he has to slammed his head on the windown… again, never thought she was that stubborn. A grin suddently appeared on Joker's face, he has a plan, yes a plan just for Harley.

They kept cat and mouse chasing each other liked that for half an hour, until Joker parked out at ACE Chemical, he got out of his car and went straight into the factory, Harley soon followed him unwared about his plan. Joker climbed up the stairs reached to the top, Harleen soon followed him, she thought he wanted another chasing game here but to her surprised it wasn't, when she reached to the top she saw hin just stood there and looking down at somethings, she closely went near the balcony rail to looked down, she saw there were many many of boiling chemical vats, the smell was strong though but she just noticed.

"What are those? And why you took me here? What do you want?" Harleen asked the Joker, who hasn't spoken anything.

"Well... You know the place where people being born... The birth place!? Yeah... This... This is my birth place Harley girl! Where this one and only Joker, King of crime was born!" Joker raised his voice, arms open and turned around to face her; he smiled his devilous smile as he run his hand through his lime green hair.

"Why you took me here?" Harleen asked as she felt her body got shivering, a chill run down her spine, she might or might not guessed what was he wanted her to do.

"Ohh Harls Harls Harls... You said you love me right? You said... you want to be with me... Then proved it..." He said as he looked deeply into her eyes, Harleen's body shivered again.

"QUESTION!" He said again, looked up at the celling. "Would you die for me?" Again he looked at her.

"I do!" She took all her strenght to answer him, showing him she was not afraid and would willing to do anything for him.

"Ahhh that's too easy." He looked up again and put a finger on his chin as if he was thinking. "Would you... would you live forrr me?" Now Joker looked straight into her eyes. "I do!" Again she said with determined.

"Careful!" He warned her. "Do not say this oath... thoughlessly..." Rising his voice as his hands dancing around, and placed his palm on her mouth, pictured a smile on her face.

" _Desire becomes surrended, surrended becomes... POWER!" -_ "You want this?" He asked her once more and running a finger to her lips, gently caressed it.

" _I do!"_ She said this time a bit weakly but the determined was still there. At this point Harleen felt liked her mind and body has been hypnotized by his words.

 _"Say it, say it... Pretty Pretty Pretty Pretty Pretty Pretty Pretty..." - "Please..."_ The word escaped Harleen's mouth without her noticed, begging...

"Ohh you're so good." He smiled and gestured her to the edge of te balcony, she walked there and turned around to looked at him once more time as she let her body fell out and down into the boiling vat. In that moment Harleen knew it was no way back now, but she despite it, depsite the fact seh couldn't swim because she would do anything he wanted to, despite her life with a bright future because it was boring, she wanted this, she wanted him and yes she was willing to sacrifice, despite... _everything._

Harleen's body fell into chemical liquid, dipping into it, letting it washed all what of her old lfe, letting everything gone, she doesn't give a fuck now. Joker stood up there, looking down as her body disappeared into the vat, he turned away, after all this was his plan, to get rid of her now he did it, but _what was this feeling!?_ Something deep inside him were yelling out.

 _Save her... Save her or you'll regret it... Save her or you'll never forgive yourself again! -_ Wtf!? Why should him regret? He just using her and now she's useless, why should he has to save her. A moment of hestitated then he groanded out loud as he turned back, took off his jacket and jumped down into the vat. He reached down to find her, grabbed her wrist and pulled her out, _was she still breathing?_ He thought to himself, worked of his instict, he placed his lips on her, blowing the saving air to her lung. She inhaled deeply, coming back from hell, her eyes wide as they met his eyes, once again he smashed his lips into her, this time was not to save her but to kiss her, a passionated kiss to celebrated a commited between, commited of belong to each other, Joker raised his head up then he laughed out loud, eerie laugh as Harley now joined him. Their clothes has been washed out, the colors dancing around, becoming a heart circle around the two clows, making the celebration of " _love"_ more special, special in a hauntingly way.

 _The day when Harley Quinn has been born. A celebration for the new Queen of Gotham city crime._ _Congratulations~_

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 **And here we go, I just want to know anyone want the M scene? I'll try making one inthe next chapter, maybe~~**

 **Reviews are welcome, I'll read and learn! Thank you.**


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